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I am many things.  I think everyday, every moment, I change my definition.  Through life experiences, more information, and growth I scrape and reshape myself to be a better person.  I doubt this process will ever end, as I know my friends and family will attest; I am light years away from being the best human being I could be, but every day I do strive to be better.  So I define myself by many words: Man, African American, husband, son, brother, cousin, friend, student, good, friendly, talkative, a people person, strong, weak, smart, intelligent, silly, quick to judgment, stubborn, positive, wishful, thankful, energetic, extravert, and the list continues.  I am always redefining myself and a variety of words can be used on any day at any given time.

Some days I am better than others, but I try to make sure I define myself with positive and progressive words.  However, there are those days where I am mean, ungrateful, negative, vengeful, and probably thousands more.  I do try everyday to remove those words and feelings from my soul and spirit, because those types of words have no benefits in my life.  At the end of the day I am what I am and that’s just a continuous work in progress.

Then I also remember that today we are more connected than ever before.  Through the use of the many social networks I find myself updated on what people are doing that I knew over 15 years ago and probably haven’t physically seen in over 10 years.  Through it all, I know that other people are also connected with me.  I only hope that they are seeing how I define myself.  Because I am also a combination of how they define me.  There is no way to separate myself from my connection to others, so my definition also comes from them.

If people define me as selfish, mean, nasty, hurtful, vengeful, negative, disrespectful, ungrateful, cruel, spiteful, and the many other harmful words that can describe someone’s character, then I have a problem.  No matter how I describe myself, if others see me in a negative light, I have a lot of work to do to change my personality.  I have to always be aware of how others are seeing me because it is only a reflection of me.  I can choose not to see or believe the reflection, but for the most part it has some truth to it.

I am not saying there won’t be days when people will be incorrect about me or have misjudgments.  However if I take a look at the macro rather than the micro, I am sure to see a trend, and that trend/pattern is important.  So I redefine myself everyday and so do others and I only hope that most of those definitions are positive because I am what I am and I am what you see.  What do you see?

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  • Jason Wiley

    New York,
    United States

  • I am a marketing executive at Jive Records, but life is about more than where I work.I am a dedicated husban…

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Jason's Latest Commentary (6)

  • November 17, 2008

    Voting is suppose to be anonymous, so I question the validity of the poll.  Also, who was responsible for the poll?  Either way, I don''t quite understand how allowing someone to be committed and become a more stable home can be bad for anyone?  Also, how does other people getting married affect others, i.e. even if a heterosexual couple gets married tomorrow, it won''t affect me, so why would a gay couple affect me.  "RIGHTS" is a powerful word and why shouldn''t everyone have the same rights?  I thought that was the point of this country....  If someone can explain why it''s so bad for same sex marriage other than, I think it''s wrong, then I will agree, as of now, I could care less if anyone wants to get married.  Because I have heard a lot of reasons why it is bad if a committed couple can''t be married; i.e., legal, in death decisions, property, etc.

  • November 11, 2008

    It''s interesting because both of our recent posts are about the overwhelming emotions that we are all feeling by the election of Barack Obama.  There are a lot of hard times ahead of our new President.  I hope we all give him time and work to help him accomplish the necessary things to make this country successful.

  • September 26, 2008

    I know I will do my part to make sure it happens next year.  Even though I spent most of my time in the hospital.  I would do it all again to make sure the picnic happens

  • August 4, 2008

    Okay, but lets be honest, there is a general type of person who is urinating in public, in the middle of the day, with no influence of alcohol or drugs.  Is it good to start that path with a child so early? 

  • July 20, 2008

    This is where I have always wondered about the translation of the Bible, because I do not believe that anyone should ever fear, i.e. be scared, nervous or un sure about GOD, but always have faith that his will and his love will carry you through anything.  To me, by having faith in him and believing in his WORD, you will always try to live life as he would want you.  Unfortunately, everyone is human, so no one can ever live life perfectly as we should, but in trying to live a GODly life, you are also assuring and displaying to everyone your Faith in GOD.  If I have Faith in him, why would I Fear him?

  • June 30, 2008

    does it really mean family

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